Cyber Symposium for Writers & Editors, April 11 & 12

by Jodie Renner, editor & author

Besides getting ready to move across the country, I've been busy preparing a webinar presentation for an exciting cyber symposium to be held April 11 & 12, which offers 8 excellent topics of interest to editors, writers, and self-publishers.

I think virtual conferences, which are showing up everywhere, are a win-win situation for everyone. Presenters and attendees alike save a LOT of money by avoiding booking flights or driving long distances, as well as on hotel and restaurant expenses. And we all get to participate from the comfort of our own homes!

8 Topics to choose from:
"Sentences with Style" by Frances Peck, "Spark up Your Story - Adding Tension, Suspense, & Intrigue" by Jodie Renner, "Write Your Way with Scrivener" by Gwen Hernandez, "Demystifying Self-Publishing" by Tammara Kennelly, "Adobe Acrobat X for the Wordsmith" by Donna Baker, "Beyond the Early Drafts: What Makes a Story Unique" by Beth Hill, "Wild about Wildcards in Microsoft Word" by Jack Lyon, and "Getting Started with FreshBooks Cloud Accounting" by Joele Ferreira. 

Here's a brief description of my own webinar, on Friday April 11 at 10:30 am to 11:30 am MDT (12:30 to 1:30 EST):

Spark Up Your Story - Adding Tension, Suspense & Intrigue

by Jodie Renner

We all know that thrillers and other fast-paced popular fiction need lots of tension, conflict, suspense, and intrigue to grip readers and provide a riveting, satisfying reading experience. But so does any other compelling story that will create a buzz and take off in sales. No matter what genre you write, it’s all about hooking your readers in, engaging them emotionally, and ensuring they keep eagerly turning the pages. Editor and author Jodie Renner presents a checklist of essential elements and effective techniques for ratcheting up the “wow” factor of any novel or short story.


Below is more info on the conference, plus the schedule of events.

Click HERE to go to the symposium website, read more, and sign up for webinars. Scroll down there for all the details.

Editors' Association of Canada - Prairie Provinces Branch (EAC-PPB)

Calgary Association of Freelance Editors (CAFE)

 

present

Cyber Symposium

PD Event for Editors & Writers

 

Create your own PD (Professional Development) experience.

There are 8 dynamic webinars to choose from.  

 

Register for as many webinars as you like. (Note: If you decide to register for 6 or more webinars, be sure to choose the “Full Symposium” rate. It costs the same as 6 individual webinars, and you can take in all 8 webinars.)
 

SCHEDULE:

Friday, April 11, 2014 – Note: Times are in “Mountain Daylight Time”

9:00 - 10:00 am	Sentences with Style (Frances Peck)
10:30 - 11:30 am	Spark Up Your Story: Adding Tension, Suspense & Intrigue (Jodie Renner)
1:00 - 2:00 pm	Write Your Way with Scrivener (Gwen Hernandez)
2:30 - 3:30 pm	Demystifying Self-Publishing (Tammara Kennelly)
6:30 - 11:00 pm	Evening Social Events in Edmonton & Calgary (details below)

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Saturday, April 12, 2014 – Note: Times are in “Mountain Daylight Time”

9:00 - 10:00 am	Adobe Acrobat X for the Wordsmith (Donna Baker)
10:30 - 11:30 am	Beyond the Early Drafts: What Makes a Story Unique (Beth Hill)
1:00 - 2:00 pm	Wild about Wildcards in Microsoft Word (Jack Lyon)
2:30 - 3:30 pm	Getting Started with FreshBooks Cloud Accounting (Joele Ferreira)

 

 

 

 

SHOW, DON’T TELL!

by Jodie Renner, editor & author  

“Show, don’t tell” is one of the most important concepts for aspiring fiction writers to grasp, and often one of the most difficult to master. It’s about showing a scene in real time, with actions and dialogue, instead of telling your readers what happened after the fact. Done well, this technique brings the scene alive and puts the readers right there, inside your character, experiencing his fear along with him, feeling the sweat on his brow and his adrenaline racing, their pulse quickening right along with his, muscles tensed, ready to leap into action.

Until this concept is pointed out to them, a common mistake among newbie fiction writers is to describe or narrate (tell) events as if they took place at some point in the past, instead of putting the reader right in the middle of the action and showing the events as they occur, along with the characters’ actions, reactions, feelings, and actual words (direct dialogue). 

To clarify what is meant by “show, don’t tell,” think of it this way: Which would you rather do, go see a great movie in a theatre with a big screen and surround sound (“show”), or hear about the movie from someone else afterward (“tell”)? That’s the difference we’re talking about here.

According to Ingermanson and Economy, “Showing means presenting the story to the reader using sensory information. The reader wants to see the story, hear it, smell it, feel it, and taste it, all the while experiencing the thoughts and feelings of a living, breathing character. Telling means summarizing the story for the reader in a way that skips past the sensory information and goes straight to the facts.”

Janet Evanovich considers “show, don’t tell” to be one of the most important principles of fiction: “Instead of stating a situation flat out, you want to let the reader discover what you're trying to say by watching a character in action and by listening to his dialogue. Showing brings your characters to life.” 

As Jack Bickham says, “Not only does moment-by-moment development make the scene seem most lifelike, it’s in a scene [with dialogue and action and reaction] where your reader gets most of his excitement. If you summarize, your reader will feel cheated – short-changed of what he reads for – without quite knowing why.”

Shelly Thacker points out, “Readers of popular fiction don’t want to experience the events of your novel at a distance; they want to FEEL what’s happening. They want to laugh, cry, hope, worry.” Shelly advises, “Strive for more dialogue than narrative. … Narrative tends to slow things down and usually leads to telling instead of showing…. Showing with action and dialogue creates vivid characters and a fast pace; telling only bogs down your story.”

Also, the bulk of the scene needs to be about a conflict of some kind between characters. No conflict = no scene. According to Jack Bickham, the conflict part of the scene “draws readers out through a moment-by-moment drama, extending the scene suspense with pleasurable agony.”

Of course, you can’t show everything, or your book would be way too long, and it would tire your readers out – or worse, end up boring them. According to James Scott Bell, “Sometimes a writer tells as a shortcut, to move quickly to the meaty part of the story or scene. Showing is essentially about making scenes vivid. If you try to do it constantly, the parts that are supposed to stand out won’t, and your readers will get exhausted.” 

The rule, says Bell, is “the more intense the moment, the more showing you do.” That’s the difference between scene and summary. You don’t want to describe every move your characters make at down times, or when going from one place to the other. That’s where you summarize or “tell,” to get them to the next important scene quickly, without a lot of boring detail.  

The main thing to keep in mind is to never to tell the reader, after the fact (or have a character telling another character), about a critical scene. Instead, dramatize it in the here and now, with dialogue, action, and lots of sensory details to bring it to life for the reader.

Copyright © Jodie Renner, 2012

Resources:
James Scott Bell, Revision and Self-Editing
Jack M. Bickham, The 38 Most Common Fiction Writing Mistakes (And How To Avoid Them)
Randy Ingermanson and Peter Economy, Writing Fiction for Dummies
Shelly Thacker (www.ShellyThacker.com), “10 Tips for a Top-Notch Novel”  

 Bio updated 2015:
Jodie Renner is a freelance fiction editor and the award-winning author of three craft-of-writing guides in her series An Editor’s Guide to Writing Compelling Fiction: Captivate Your Readers, Fire up Your Fiction, and Writing a Killer Thriller. She has also published two clickable time-saving e-resources to date: Quick Clicks: Spelling List and Quick Clicks: Word Usage. You can find Jodie at www.JodieRenner.com, www.JodieRennerEditing.com, at The Kill Zone blog alternate Mondays, and on Facebook, Twitter, and Google+.

STYLE BLUNDERS IN FICTION

by Jodie Renner, editor and author 

No, I’m not talking about the fashion police coming after you. I’m talking about those little errors and bad habits that creep into your manuscript, weaken your message, and add up to an overall feeling of amateurish writing.

The good news is that, unlike the more critical creative flow of story plot and character ideas, these little bad habits are easy to correct, resulting in a much more polished, compelling manuscript.

Here are some of those nasty little weeds to find and yank out of your literary garden, to be replaced with unique, striking blooms that will be the envy of the neighborhood:

1. Take out wishy-washy qualifiers like quite, sort of, almost, kind of, a bit, pretty, somewhat, rather, usually, basically, generally, probably, mostly, really, etc. Forget “He was quite brave,” or “She was pretty intelligent” or “It was almost scary,” or “Nala could kind of feel a sense of foreboding.” These qualifiers dilute your message, reduce the impact, and make the imagery weaker. Take them out. Even very is to be avoided – it’s like you’re saying the word after it needs reinforcing. “She was beautiful” packs more punch than “She was very beautiful.”

2. Avoid –ing verbs wherever possible. Use –ed verbs instead – they’re stronger and more immediate. “He was racing” is weaker than “He raced.” “They searched the house” is more immediate than “They were searching the house.” Rewrite -ing verbs whenever you can, and you’ll strengthen your writing and increase its power.

3. Show us, don’t tell us how your characters are feeling. Avoid statements like “She was depressed,” “He found that funny,” or “The little girl felt sad.” Show these emotions by their actions, words, and body language: “Eyes downcast, shoulders slumped, head down, she refused to answer as she pushed her food around the plate.”

4. Avoid colorless, overused verbs like walked, ran, went, saw, talked, ate, did, got, put, took, turned. Get out your thesaurus (or use the MS Word one. Hint: look up the present tense: walk, run, eat, say, etc.) to find more expressive, powerful verbs instead, like crept, loped, stumbled, stomped, glimpsed, noticed, observed, witnessed, spied, grunted, whimpered, devoured, consumed, gobbled, wolfed, munched, bolted, raged, or grabbed.

5. Keep adverbs to a minimum. Instead of propping up a boring, anemic verb with an adverb, look for strong, descriptive, powerful verbs. Instead of “He walked slowly” go for “He plodded” or “He trudged” or “He dawdled.” Instead of “She ate hungrily” say “She devoured the bag of chips,” or “She wolfed down the pizza.” Instead of “They talked quickly,” say “They babbled.”

6. Use adjectives sparingly and consciously. Instead of stringing a bunch of adjectives in front of an ordinary, overused noun, find a more precise, expressive noun to show rather than tell. Overuse of adjectives can also turn your writing into “purple prose” that is melodramatic and overly “flowery.”

7. Dialogue tags – Stick with the basic he said and she said (or asked) wherever possible, rather than “he emphasized” or “she reiterated” or “Mark conjectured" or "Lisa questioned,” etc. These kinds of words stand out, so they take the reader out of the story, whereas “said” is almost invisible. However, I like dialogue tags that describe how something is said, as in he shouted, she murmured, he grumbled, she whispered, he stuttered, she muttered, he yelled. You can often eliminate the dialogue tag altogether and just use an action beat instead: He picked up the phone. “That’s it. I’m calling the cops.”

8. Describe the stimulus, then the response: When writing an action scene, make sure your sentence structure mimics the order of the actions. The reader pictures the actions in the order that she reads them, so it’s confusing to read about the reaction before finding out what caused it. So describe the action first, then the reaction: Instead of “She screamed when the door slammed on her finger,” write: “The door slammed on her finger and she screamed.” (or “causing her to scream,” or whatever.)

9. Avoid the passive voice: For greater impact, when describing an action, start with the doer, then describe what he did, rather than the other way around. Use the more direct active voice wherever possible, for more impact. Instead of “The house was taped off by the police,” write “The police taped off the house.” Also, avoid empty phrases like “There is”, “There was,” “It’s,” “It was.” Jump right in with what you’re actually talking about.

10. Avoid negative constructions wherever possible – they can be confusing to the reader. Instead of “I didn’t disagree with him,” say “I agreed with him.”

11. Avoid frequent repetition of the same word or forms of the same word. If you’ve already used a certain noun or verb in a paragraph or section, go to your thesaurus to find a different way to express that idea when you mention it again. Also, avoid repetition of the same imagery. Whether you’re describing the setting, the weather, or the hero or heroine, vary your wording.

12. Avoid formal sentences and pretentious language. Rather than impressing your readers, ornate, fancy words can just end up alienating them. As Jessica Page Morrell says in Thanks, But This Isn’t for Us, “if a reader is constantly consulting a dictionary when reading your prose, you’re dragging him from the story.” As Morrell points out, “Simple words are close to our hearts and easily understood.... simpler words are unpretentious, yet contain power and grace….Pompous words are alienating, boring, and outdated.”

13. Avoid being overly wordy. Don’t clutter up your sentences with a lot of extra little words. For example, instead of writing in the vicinity of, just write near. Instead of as a consequence of, just write because. Instead of a large percentage of, just use many. Instead of in the direction of, use toward. Instead of “The sword that he was holding was knocked to the ground,” just say “His sword was knocked to the ground.” Extra words drain life from your work. The fewer words used to express an idea, the more punch it has.

Jodie Renner is a freelance fiction editor and the award-winning author of three craft-of-writing guides in her series An Editor’s Guide to Writing Compelling Fiction: FIRE UP YOUR FICTION,  CAPTIVATE YOUR READERS, and WRITING A KILLER THRILLER, as well as two clickable time-saving e-resources, QUICK CLICKS: Spelling List and QUICK CLICKS: Word Usage. She has also organized two anthologies for charity: VOICES FROM THE VALLEYS – Stories and Poems about Life in BC’s Interior, and CHILDHOOD REGAINED – Stories of Hope for Asian Child Workers. Website: www.JodieRenner.com; Facebook. Amazon Author Page.