by
Jodie Renner, freelance editor
Congratulations!
You’ve finished the first draft of your novel! Now it’s time to go back and
polish up your first few pages. Then later you can do a third—or tenth—rewrite
of that all-important first few paragraphs to create the most enticing hook
possible. For today, we’ll talk about the essential ingredients of the first
five pages, as most agents and acquiring editors—and readers—will stop reading
by the fifth page, or sooner, if the story and characters don’t grab them by
then.
In February 2011, I
attended a workshop by literary agent Kristin Nelson at the San Miguel Writers’
Conference, in which she had attendees anonymously submit the first two pages
of their novel. She started reading the submissions and stopped at the spot
where she lost interest. In many instances it was after the first or second
paragraph! Sometimes she made it almost to the end of the first page, and in
one case, even halfway through the second page. Then she told us why that
manuscript, as written, would be rejected. (Not a single one of those made it.)
In a follow-up article
in Writer’s Digest (Oct. 2011), Kristen gives four examples of submissions and
where and why she stopped reading three of them (all on the first page): “too
much dialogue,” “overuse of description,” and “lack of tension.” In her
workshop, “lack of clear protagonist,” “unsympathetic protagonist,” “boring”
and “confusing” were other reasons given.
After Ms. Nelson's
workshop, I heard a lot of “If she’d only read a little further, she would have
seen that…” or “That wasn’t fair. She didn’t give me a chance. How can she
judge a manuscript by only reading one page?” Unfortunately, agents get tens of
thousands of submissions a year, and if you don’t grab them within the first
page or two, the sad reality is that your book will probably be rejected. And
of course, as readers, most of us will read the back cover and maybe the first
page, then decide based on that whether to buy the book or not. And even when
I’ve paid money for a book, if it doesn’t grab me by about page ten, I’ll
discard it.
One of the main
reasons agents, acquiring editors and readers will reject a book after reading
the first few pages is that they’re confused. They need to get a picture right
away about whose story it is, why we should care about that person,
and roughly where and when the story
is taking place. Once readers have a handle on the main character and the
setting, they can relax and settle into the story world. Of course, you also
have to spark their interest with a problem early on—put your protagonist in
some hot water with an inciting incident, so the reader can sympathize with
them and start rooting for them.
Whose
story is it?
It’s important to
start out the novel in the viewpoint of your protagonist, as the first person
the readers read about is the person they start identifying with, and they’ll
feel cheated if suddenly, after they’ve invested some time and effort into
getting to know this person and bonding a bit with him, he suddenly turns out
to be not someone they should be rooting for at all, but in fact the
antagonist, whom they’re supposed to be hating, or worse yet, a minor character
or someone who gets killed off a little while later.
As Steve Berry, bestselling author and sought-after writing workshop
leader, told a packed room of eager aspiring writers at Craftfest, part of
Thrillerfest 2011 in New York, “Always start your book in the point of view of
your protagonist.” I think this is excellent advice, as the readers—not to
mention agents and acquiring editors—want to know right away whose story it is,
who to start bonding with and cheering for.
Here are the first questions your readers will be asking:
Why should I care about this character, anyway?
Readers aren’t going to invest time reading a story about a character
they don’t like or can’t identify with, so make sure your protagonist is
likeable and sympathetic, to draw the readers in to identify with him or her.
And make them well-rounded and complex, with hopes and fears, strengths and
weaknesses, and inner conflict. And of course have them confronted with a
problem—an inciting incident—within the first few pages, as conflict is what
drives fiction forward. A perfect character with an ideal life is both annoying
and boring—not a formula for
compelling fiction!
Where and when is the action taking place?
Without drowning us in long descriptive passages right at the
beginning, give the readers a few hints very early on—definitely on the first
page—of the setting of your story: Contemporary? Past? Future? Country/Culture?
Urban/rural/wilderness? Which city or town? And so on. Don’t confuse and
frustrate your readers by making them wonder where on earth all this is
happening, and whether it’s in the present or some other time.
Why should I read this story?
Show your stuff in your first five pages or so. Draw the reader (or
agent or editor) in with a great first scene, well-written, with interesting,
complex characters, some intriguing action, and compelling, natural-sounding
dialogue. Include your inciting incident and initial conflict, and hint at
greater problems to come. Introduce or hint at a worthy adversary—a cunning
villain or attractive but maddening/annoying possible love interest. And write
your first pages in the same tone, style and voice you’ll be using for your
novel, so the readers will have a good idea of what they’ll be getting into.
And of course, continue in this same tone (suspenseful, humorous, serious,
romantic, etc.) for the rest of the novel, so the reader won’t feel cheated or
misled.
But don’t get bogged down trying to perfect your opening pages in the
early stages – wait until you’ve got all or most of your first draft written.
By then, you’ll be “in the groove” and you’ll know your character and his/her
problems a lot better, as well as the resolution, so this part will flow so
much more easily.
© Jodie Renner
Two
related articles by Jodie: “Act First,
Explain Later” and “Set up Your Story in the First Paragraphs”
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Both are on sale at Amazon, and you don’t need to own a Kindle to buy and read Kindle e-books – you can download them to your PC, Mac, tablet or smartphone. Style that Sizzles will be out in paperback soon.
